The Easthampton Public School District in Massachusetts had a close call last week when they almost hired a straight white male as their new school Superintendent. The district had offered Vito Perrone the job already. Fortunately, he revealed himself to be a horrible person just in the nick of time, so the job offer was rescinded. His crime? Perrone referred to a couple of broads at the school district as “ladies” in an email.
Perrone seemed like the perfect candidate for the job. He used to coach football in the district, and he was a school principal there years ago. Perrone says he considers Easthampton to be his home, so he was excited at the opportunity to become the school superintendent.
But during the contract negotiations, Perrone committed an unpardonable sin. In an email exchange with two of the “persons with uteruses” on the hiring committee, Perrone referred to them as “ladies.” That sent School Committee Chairperson Cynthia Kwiecinski and her executive assistant Suzanne Colby into a tailspin of rage.
Kwiecinski accused Perrone of committing a “microaggression” against her and Colby. “The fact that he didn’t know that as an educator was a problem,” said Kwiecinski as she rushed toward her fainting couch.
Perrone said he was shocked by the withdrawal of the contract offer. He grew up in a time when calling people “ladies” and “gentlemen” was actually a sign of respect. What an ignorant bigot! Doesn’t he know you’re not supposed to assign genders to people until they tell you their pronouns?!
Okay, enough of the sarcasm. It sounds like Perrone is the one who actually lucked out in this situation. Can you imagine having to go to work with bossy harridans like that every day? The school district was correct about one thing. Its employees are not “ladies” under any definition of the word.
